Cinderella endured torment from her stepmother and stepsisters. Desperate to seek help without alerting her vigilant stepmother, she then wanted to share her challenges with someone whom she could freely discuss her situation with discreetly.

The Beast from “Beauty and the Beast” wanted to share how traumatized he felt about being turned into a beast. He was scared nobody would see him as the prince he once was, hidden behind his beastly appearance. He hoped to find someone who’d understand and believe in the prince trapped inside him.

The little mouse Jerry from “Tom and Jerry” yearned for someone who comprehended the complex dynamics between him and Tom. Uncertain whether he was the aggressor or his actions were a reaction to Tom’s actions, Jerry wanted to seek clarity in this tangled relationship, questioning how much longer this cycle could persist.

What Cinderella, Beast and Jerry were looking for was a Safe space.

Fears of judgement, lack of trust, vulnerability, past experiences, shame, and societal norms inhibit sharing. The word “safe” carries an inherent sense of security.

When someone says “I am safe,” it often brings a sense of relief and calm. It signifies that the person free from danger or threat. It creates a feeling of security, both physically and emotionally, instilling a sense of comfort and reassurance. Saying “I am safe” can alleviate anxiety and fear, allowing one to relax, breathe easier, and feel protected.

When someone says “I am in a safe space” it means they feel really comfortable and protected. It’s like being in a place where they can be themselves without worrying about being judged, questioned or hurt. In a safe space, individuals feel free to express themselves authentically, share their thoughts and emotions openly, and explore vulnerabilities without fear of criticism or harm.

What steps can we take to establish “A Safe Space” for friends, family, colleagues, or anyone seeking to confide their deepest feelings, share thoughts, narrate their journey, or discuss what they’re experiencing?

Imagine sitting under a cozy blanket of understanding and support, surrounded by an atmosphere where every word finds a warm welcome, no matter how heavy or light.

Here’s how we can make that happen for anyone looking for that Safe Space

Open the doors wide: When someone needs to talk, let’s invite them in with an open heart. Show them they’re welcomed and safe in our space.

Our secret garden: Imagine our space as a secret garden where whispers aren’t shared beyond its boundaries. Promise them that whatever they share stays between us, just like whispers in the wind.

Empathy is our compass: Understanding their feelings, seeing the world through their eyes, is how we can connect deeply.

The art of listening: Listening without interruption, letting their story unfold at their pace. Listening to the emotions within the words, the tales within the pain, and the intricate complexities within the inner chaos.

Validating feelings: Imagine each emotion they express is a precious gem. Let’s pick up each one, hold it up to the light, and say, “I understand,” or “That must be tough.”

Offering Gentle Support: Instead of swooping in with advice, opinions or views offer them a soft cushion of support. Sometimes, all they need is a listening ear, not a problem solver. Avoid shifting the focus to your own experiences when they’re sharing theirs.

Respecting their journey: Their story is their own, and they’re the storyteller. Respecting their pace, their twists and turns, asking to open as much as they want but never pushing.

A secure Haven: They can dock their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgement.

Leaving room for growth: Like a garden that blooms with care, our space is where they can grow. Encouraging, supporting, and nurturing their journey is what makes it a safe haven.

Joy in Sharing: Their happiness post-sharing confirms the safety and warmth within our space.

And this is exactly what a Coach offers – a safe space. A safe space to speak openly, to share thoughts and emotions, uncovering not just surface feelings but delving into the unspoken complexities steering their life. It’s a space for exploring the uncharted within, revealing the words never voiced and discovering emotions they never knew existed.

In a safe place that a Coach offers, vulnerability becomes strength, unsaid thoughts find words, and hidden feelings lead to self-discovery.

You can connect with Venkateshwari N Click Here

As a Professional Coach, it is pertinent to know the process of coaching and be skilled at it. It is equally important for the coach to have experienced coaching as a client, made their own transformation, and created the trust and strong bonding for the process. I firmly believe in being authentic and that comes only through sharing my experience.

The year 2022 was a year of exploration of several career paths after I quit the corporate life. As part of this exploration, I came across coaching as one of the professional paths. I developed keen interest in the process of coaching as something within me started to resonate with it. Coaching as a career path was still a long way since I was grappling with multiple options, lot of self-doubts, a few possible career combinations.

It wasn’t easy to make the choice as there was no clear vision of the future and I did not have all the information needed to make a clear choice. Relying on the external factors wasn’t an option was my realisation. That got me to rely on coaching as a tool (by subjecting myself to be a client and get coached by some of my peers) to gain clarity on my leadership, career path and the coaching business and in the process having the conviction & courage to move ahead. Below is a summary of some of the key realisations and learnings from getting coached.

• Explored variety of career possibilities and realised the emotional connection to the one where I want to be invested in as the next career path i.e. to be a full-time Coach.
• Answering the question on whether I want to deepen my coaching skill by pursuing Professional Certified Coach (PCC).
• Worked through several pitfalls on the way, overcoming many internal barriers, and then set up the business of coaching.
• Overcame self-doubts about my ability to relate to the potential target clients and the segment, and very clearly determining the services that I can offer.
• Realised my own brand and leadership style, the values I stand for, and defining my beliefs that make me feel empowered.

The essence of it is that I became more aware, more clear, more realised, more empowered. Thanks to all those wonderful coaches in the community who made this possible through the coaching process. A clear path emerged in which I have been traversing and ready to face the new challenges along the way that allows me to grow further.

Let us spend a little bit of time on the International Coaching Federation (ICF) definition of Coaching and discuss a few nuances on the word “Inspire”.

The definition of coaching is “Partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential”. While every word is important, I would like to get your attention to the word “inspires.”

Inspire means fill (someone) with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative. We get inspired by various sources, to name a few, motivational videos, motivational quotes, watching or listening to leaders whom we follow, people around us and by reading books. The inspiration from these sources helps us to make a few moves towards growth but do not take us far.

Coaching is another source for creating the inspiration for people, in a safe and trusted environment, that allows new thinking to emerge, help connect several existing thoughts to make it more realistic and impactful, and the one that allows them to create what they want and sustain the results for long.

I got inspired through various sources in having my self-growth and transformation. It is through the coaching process that I got utmost clarity on the career path and the related steps that I had to take in becoming a Coach.

Let’s get to the conclusion now.

To grow and create sustainable results:

• Internal inspiration is the way.
• Coaching is a tool.
• A Coach, your companion.

Leadership is an inside-out approach; Spirituality is an inside-out approach;

Coaching is an inside-out approach too!

Would love to hear your views and opinions in the comments section.

You can connect with J. Lakshminarayanan (JL), ACC Click Here